Sleep deprivation & parents of young children.

Did you think you were ever tired before you had children? That was child's play. This is a totally different tiredness. You may now be wondering what it feels like to be fit again. People often joke about it like Moe-der. But it is a lot less funny when you have another broken night, and for an extended period of time. Sometimes even years. Did you know that research shows that young parents get 68% (!) less sleep than they actually need? Lack of sleep, or with an expensive word sleep deprivation, is killing.

First, the scientific insights regarding sleep deprivation.

Sleep affects our mood, our brain functions and our assessments of all kinds of situations. For example, in a sleep lab, scientists wake people without a baby a few times during the night. These subjects still have it relatively easy; they don't have a baby to feed, change and put to sleep. Yet these subjects show symptoms of depression. Simply by waking up from time to time. Staying awake for 19 hours produces about the same symptoms as being drunk.

What lack of sleep can do to you (and to your relationship):

Besides being quite (quite) annoying and impacting daily life, work and our relationships with partners, it can also lead to funny situations.

So you are not that sharp.

"Every morning I kind of have a routine. I don't think about that so much. Okay ... I don't think about that. I'm awake, but going on autopilot. My youngest son's teeth were coming through. This AND he had a slight ear infection. He was not sleeping. My girlfriend and I slept in shifts. When I was on duty, I would lie on the couch with my son in my arms. Every attempt I made to get him to sleep on the couch failed. He kept waking up. My support pillow constellations all collapsed and I.... I didn't sleep a wink. This went on like this for 5 nights. On the ^5thday, my girlfriend and I hated each other, the world and the entire universe. Where in my morning routine I always make coffee, with one of those iron things on the stove, I grabbed the iron coffee pot with both hands-forgetting that I had already made coffee while the whole house smelled of coffee-full and burned my hand. " Mark from Amsterdam

When I am very tired, my ability to plan well goes overboard first.

"My daughter had kept us awake for a week. I think I had slept 10 hours in 1 week. Super bad. In the morning on Friday, I got up at 6:45h (I had just arrived in my first REM sleep, and had had about 2 hours of sleep), got dressed. My wife was still asleep. So was my daughter (sure enough, she was asleep just then). Fortunately, for once in the past few months, traffic was nice and easy. I arrive at work, I always go in through the back entrance, and the door is locked. Since the traffic was so cooperative, I didn't let it affect my mood. I arrived at the main entrance. Also locked. It was Saturday." Yassir from Eindhoven

In the tropical years, I try to be as efficient as possible. But my husband...

"When I cook, I cook for 2 days. I'm quite proud of this efficiency if I'm honest. This makes things a little easier for me. Life so to speak. My husband is ... different. If I have slept a little there are quite days when I like him. If I compare with my girlfriends who have young families, we still have quite a kind of sex life. I also still find him quite funny. He could do a little more about his beer belly, but other than that...our relationship may not deserve a beauty prize, but our partnership is doing better than the people around us. But not on the afternoon in question with the lasagna in the oven. I had turned on the lasagna. Salient detail; we had been sleeping 3 hours a night off and on for two and a half weeks because everyone had taken turns getting sick. Except me. I put the lasagna in the oven. Husband on the couch is on his iphone. I walk upstairs while the lasagna still needs 10 minutes. I say to him "honey, I'm just upstairs doing laundry, you turn off the oven in a minute. He makes a sound that was somewhere between an affirmation and a burp. I walk upstairs. Go do the laundry. Suddenly after 15 minutes I smell something has burned. I think...fuck . the lasagna. I run downstairs. My husband is sitting on the couch in the same position. It smells huge. And .... AND....the oven alarm has been going off for 10 minutes. Lasagna black. Mood black. Marriage emotionally over." Nadia from Zoetermeer

Parents Inc. helps young parents cope with fatigue and sleep deprivation.

Funny, of course, those examples. But when you yourself are so tired that you no longer function, it's a lot less funny. Never knew you could be so tired. Parents Inc. helps parents in the tropical years deal with fatigue. We outline what helps other parents in dealing better with sleep deprivation. We also talk about the psychological and relational effect of little sleep and how to make sure it doesn't come between parents. Parents Inc. lets you engage in conversation and you will be inspired by tips from other parents.

Enter your zip code and see if you can take the course for free (worth 129.00).

More and more municipalities (49+) are finding it important for young parents to become kid-proof.

They provide free enrollment for all parents in their communities.

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