To take a dad day or not? This is a question that many young or soon-to-be dads are walking around with. Many dads would like to have a dad day. Others hesitate and some work hard because the bank account or career requires it.
Balancing work and home is pretty tough for young parents.
Parents solve this in several ways. Sometimes one will work a little less and the other a little more. This can be pleasant and good. In the Netherlands we have it easier compared to other countries. Many Dutch people work part-time and have a lot of time for the home front. And even then it sometimes feels quite difficult to keep all the balls in the air. Most families experience that income goes down because they work less and the costs of children are added.
Fathers are of great importance!
What is frustrating for some fathers is that in almost everything about parenting, the father is far in the background. If he can be found at all. In the bulk of children's books and movies, the father is often portrayed as absent, authoritarian and unkind. But fathers are of great importance! The way fathers play with their children greatly influences how they grow up. The way fathers play is physical and challenging. Of course, fathers can also be sweet and cuddly. But physical play makes children more accepted by their peers later in life. When fathers engage with their four-year-old child's emotional world, the children later become more social and competent, psychologist Robert Seers found. The best predictor of the level of compassion in a 31-year-old adult is a father's involvement at age five. Later, these adults have the best relationships with their spouses, children and community. Children with fathers who have an active role in parenting have children who have higher verbal skills, IQ scores and later academic achievement. I can't look into your bank account (thankfully), but let this be a plea for your active relationship in he upbringing and care of the little one! In short it is important for fathers to have an active presence. Sometimes fathers are excluded by their wives. Sometimes they exclude themselves. When fathers discover that they can make all the nurturing a game, they are less likely to be pushed out. They thus discover the great joy of the primary caregiving process.
Enjoy your daddy day.
Want to learn more about being parents together in the tropical years? The online Parents Inc. course is for expectant parents and parents already in the tropical years and will make you the best dad in the world!