Congratulations!!! You have become a grandfather or grandmother. Perhaps for the first time or you already have several grandchildren. What an impossibly wonderful feeling, isn't it? Have you been thinking, "What does the grandpa/grandma role entail?" "What will you have to do?" "How will you fill it? Everyone has different answers to these questions. The most important question to arrive at an answer is the following. If your grandchild is about 30 years old and he/she is sitting at a party with a close friend talking about his/her grandparents. What would you want him to say about your relationship with your grandchild. The answer you give to this question will give the most direction as to how you can go about this role. Because you can do what you think is important for your relationship with your grandchild.
In doing so, it is good to know that each generation of grandparents is also very different.
This generation is often still full of energy. Many grandparents finally have the time and space to do a little more for themselves. Perhaps travel or devote your time to hobbies or volunteer work. Whatever it is you want to do, also think about yourself and what you need. Previous generations of grandparents were constantly there for their children. Now that may still be true, yet another world is also pulling at you, a world where you too want to be the center of attention, where you finally have time for yourself. Good luck in filling this role well.
What can you do for your own children?
By the way, what is also good to know, and perhaps you remember it from the birth of your own children: the transition to parenthood can be quite profound. It is wonderful, but at the same time it also demands a lot. Parenthood is a complicated process involving many complex psychological processes. The transition to parenthood is a radical change in the family system. The roles of partners and parents must be reinvented and redistributed. Today's parents spend more time with their children than they used to. Your child is now figuring out how she/he will emerge as a parent? That is very difficult to determine in advance. Also, one does not know how the partner is developing as a parent. As a parent, you develop your own identity (not joint!) of parenthood. This happens sometime between pregnancy and the first 18 months postpartum. As a parent, you need time to become comfortable in that role. As a grandparent, support where desired and know that the grandchild belongs to two parents. Also of your son or daughter-in-law who may have very different ideas about parenting. Every child born is an amalgamation of two families and that will also mean that they will do things very differently in different areas regarding parenting and care as it is in your family. Sometimes this includes minor clashes. Give parents space to become a parenting couple together.
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